It’s that time of year again…

When describing just how hot the UAE gets during the summer, one of the most common analogies is “like stepping into an oven”.

We personally haven’t spent all that much time inside cooking appliances, so we can neither confirm nor deny the accuracy of this statement.

However, we do know the season brings its own unique challenges. Here are some of the most unexpected things that happen during the UAE’s summer.

1. Hot water comes out of your cold tap

The simple act of taking a shower turns into a complicated tap dance, as you discover the searing temperatures have more or less boiled your water supply. The easiest way to deal with this is to turn off your hot water tank and use the hot tap as your cold tap and vice versa. The same goes for your washing machine – unless you prefer extremely form-fitting garments.

2. Your toilet turns into a steam bath

The less said on this one, the better, but just know your toilet water is not immune from the over-heating phenomenon.

3. Outdoor air-conditioning is a thing

Did you know Dubai was the first city in the world to come up with air-conditioned bus shelters?

4. It’s almost impossible to get into your car

At least without rolling down all the windows and cranking up the AC on the fresh air setting for at least 15 minutes first. Proceed with caution…

5. The beach becomes a no-go zone

Think you can cool down with an invigorating swim in the sea? Good luck with that. Jumeirah Beach sea temperatures reach a peak during the summer of about 35 degrees Celsius – so it’s less “refreshing dip”, and more “onsen”.

6. You might find yourself with some unintentional tattoos

Do your pants have any decorative metal zippers or buttons? Spend too long out in the blazing sun, and you could well end up branded. The same goes for trying to pick up your phone after leaving it on your sun lounger – ouch.

7. Your colleagues start buying weird gadgets

Office desks are suddenly littered with an arsenal of USB-powered fans, electronic ice cubes and self-cooling cushions.

8. And you start carrying an umbrella for portable shade

Embrace the parasol, people.

9. But you still have to buy warm clothes

You and your colleagues are constantly at odds about what defines “room temperature”. Apparently for some, it’s 10 degrees Celsius.

10. You actually suffer from vitamin D deficiency

Because you’re forced to spend so much time indoors. Possibly the most maddening irony of all.