Support act: Josh Widdicombe
VIDEO: Jack Dee

They say comedians can often be some of the world’s most miserable people. Well, nobody proves that old adage more than Jack Dee.

For someone who specialises in making people smile until their cheeks hurt, it is ironic that the only facial discomfort Dee feels is the wrinkling of his nose as he describes yet another thing that annoys him.

A stand-up comedian for almost 20 years and a regular fixture on TV panel shows in Britain and in his own BBC sitcom, Lead Balloon, Dee brings his frustration-filled act to Dubai this month.

Before a career in comedy, Dee was a waiter in London (we’re guessing he didn’t get many tips). One night he went to an open mic event at the famous Comedy Store and told some gags on stage. He quickly rose through the ranks and gave up the waiter job to go full time – much to the delight of the restaurant’s manager, we imagine.

What followed was critical acclaim, awards, sold out gigs in venues that just kept getting bigger and bigger, plus an autobiography with a typically sardonic title, Thanks For Nothing. Yes, he’s a glass-half-empty kind of guy but, trust us, this guy is very funny – right Jack?

Jack Dee in Dubai - one-off gig announced

Not one to mince his words, here’s a few of Jack Dee’s best quotes

“Why do builders have see-through lunch boxes? So they can tell if they’re going home or coming to work”

“Power showers: it’s like the riot police are in your bathroom”

“What happens if you take a metal detector through another, bigger metal detector? Do they cancel each other out or does the universe just collapse on itself as they are two entities that should never touch?”

“I like the freebies in hotels: the shower cap, the sewing kit, the curtains”

“People ask me about touring. I tell them it’s a lot of time in my car and hotel rooms. I talk to my wife on the phone and I see my kids every two weeks. It’s perfect”

“Shopping channels. I like to ring them up and say, I’m just looking

“I love a good book. I read it, tear out the last five pages, and pass it on”

“If at first you don’t succeed, you are clearly not cut out for it. Give up and move on”

“Cats are just dogs who’ve been to drama school”

March 19
Dubai World Trade Centre, Sheikh Zayed Road, Dubai, 8pm, Dhs300. Tel: (04) 4390900. Metro: World Trade Centre.